hee, cute.

wow, she is just lovely

"He ran for the president of Iran. We ran, together to a tropical island"

Woops, I really like this song

I'M READY!

My fuckin' finger, Chester! He cut off my fuckin' finger!

I very honestly nearly sent myself to the emergency room this weekend. What kind of fool reaches out, fleshy finger parts extended and exposed, to catch a falling kitchen knife? I do. I'm the fool who does such a thing and I pity myself deeply.

I also tempted the emergency room gods and goddesses by knowingly and willingly eating chicken I wasn't too sure about. "When in doubt, throw it out." I know this truism but, eh, this chicken was so cheesy and delicious looking - - I simply couldn't stop myself.


I bet you can't believe that, after months of not posting anything new other than other people's creativity and wit, this is what I choose to bring you, kitchen-related near-misses. Ah, the joy of blogging. Oh, and I have plenty of pithy and sophisticated thoughts as well. OK.

Ciao, buddies.
-Nina

great french pop.

so very, very smart, this man.

I've been a bad, bad girl...

Have ya'll seen the new LOST "music videos" from abc promo monkeys?

I love it - - how funny. I especiallly like the song choices for the Locke & Kate videos.

"The Beginning of the End"

This post is actually serving as equal parts update (for the adoring masses, I'm sure) and a reminder list for myself. There is just so much happening these days. Wee!!

What was awesome:

1. Birthday festivities. Thanks, friends and lovers. I heart u all.

2. The "Blue State Ball" for air america minnesota. Really kind of a dumb event, but it was fun to do something different, jump into waiting limos instead of cabs, to see Al Franken and Ed Schultz and, of course, everything having to do with Stephanie Miller. (Stay tuned for some photo evidence.)

What will be awesome:

3. I'm starting a new class tomorrow, on literature of birth and death. I'm pretty excited about it for a few reasons: it's the mpls campus so I can leave work a bit early. grab a cup of coffee and a snack item and have a little down time before class. I've never really done it that way and I think it will be nice. Also, the professor is trying to get the Hennepin Co. coroner to come to class, which - as a stupidly, but consistently obsessed crime scene investigation show fan - thrills me.

4. Vegas, baby. Thank you, Janelle and friends, for the balls and the follow-thru to pull of a Vegas wedding. Mama loves it. Especially awesome, certainly, will be the thrill-rides/spa day on Friday. This is how we'll sound: AHHHHH! ahhhhhh.

5. TUESDAY! TUESDAY! TUESDAY! (In a monster truck show voice, of course. Try it.)
Super Tuesday, which will be oh so interesting, is right around the corner. I can hardly belize it, with all the buildup and hype. I just can't wait to see how it all turns out. Predictions?

6. And finally, OMFG, OMFG, OMFG: LOST, S4 premiere. mere days - hours, even - away. I can barely handle it.

See? Seriously, so much happening. We are so totally extreme.

Ciao, buddies.
-Nina

P.S. LOSTfans, here's a nice little collection of all of the "mobisodes" (mini-episodes, created by the actual creators+ of LOST) in case you missed them or are not as painfully dorky as me.

Some interesting ones, some meh ones. The last one, however, is quite the head-scratcher...

"secretary of lookin' good"

o. wow.

my buddy Jason is blogging again

top songs, top albums! hooray. read all about how to lead the perfect life in nordeast mpls.

15% Guiliani and 13% Huckabee, btw.

anyone else totally obsessed with election coverage right now? I KNOW it's too early, I KNOW it's over hyped, I KNOW it is an admission of my incredible dorkiness... but I just can't help it.

seriously, this shit is interesting. and this is the first time I've felt so undecided. I mean, not undecided on the question of dem v. republican (nfs), but which dem I prefer. I like a lot about all of them. I honestly don't know what I'd do if I had to vote tomorrow. I'm not complaining; I do not see this as a bad problem to have right now.

I've taken some tests like this one:


(63% Clinton, 60% Obama, 58% Edwards)

I know they are wild oversimplifications, but I sort of like those little quizzes because they are about issues and not personality, which - wow - is turning out to mean everything these days, isn't it? The I just don't like her but I don't know why if pressed to come up with an answer factor is strong here. As is the he seems like a real regular, likable guy, especially when compared to the slippery fools surrounding him theme.

I like the shift to "change" that the rhetoric has taken. although it became almost painfully ubiquitous within a matter of minutes after Obama's amazing Iowa victory speech, it's the right idea. we can fix this mess... let's stop giving up all hope on this country and remember what makes it great... all that. good stuff.

and then there's the other side. their whole field is a total joke. and it's my new favorite joke - - even better than the best ever man with no arms and no legs jokes. Phil, definitely.

ciao, buddies.
-Nina

An e-mail commenting on e-mail... how meta. And funny.

Dear All,

My thanks to all those who have sent me emails this past year...

I must send my thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat shit in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet towel with every envelope that needs sealing. Also, I now have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown); who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time.

I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.

Or from the senior bank clerk in Nigeria who wants me to split $7 million with me for pretending to be a long lost relative of a customer who died.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca-Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer can buy gas without taking a man along to watch the car so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore and Uzbekistan.

Thanks to you, I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my ass.

And thanks to your great advice, I can't even pick up the $5.00 I found dropped in the car park because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00pm this afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician.

By the way...a South American scientist after a lengthy study has discovered that people with low IQ who have infrequent sexual activity always read their e-mails with their hand on the mouse. Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.

Creepy vs. Dorky: What's Worse?

The Romneys

The Huckabees

Did you know that mice can't burp?

I know, I know... it's been awhile since I've blogged real words and not just linked to other people's funny stuff. I don't know about you fools, but I have been a very busy bee these days. It's a bit much and I wouldn't mind being a little less popular. JK. kinda.

What's new with me? Let's see, work is busy and a bummer (my coworker/friend/style muse is moving away), still settling into the new apartment. Right now, all of my minutes are spent finishing up the creative nonfiction classics class I've been taking this term. 10 books in 14 weeks.

It's been excellent but also one of the, if not the, most challenging class I've taken yet in my program. And the fun part, yah you this one... I don't even need it. I graduated already, remember? I know, I'm either an overachiever or an idiot - you decide.

In Cold Blood might just be one of the best books - ever, by the way. We've also read some other amazing nonfiction that I am very pleased to have read, namely: Desert Solitaire, Zami: A New Spelling of My Name, and Hiroshima. In Cold Blood is off the charts though- in lots of ways.


Things all over the place seem pretty fucked up right now... church shootings, mall shootings, southern baptist preachers as sudden right wing front runners (wtf?), white house authorized torture and missing interrogation video (of course), a magical talk show host who can supposedly single-handily change history (wow). Oh, and the fucking Spice Girls are back (zigazahahhh).

Another great WTF? moment from last week:

"Freedom requires religion just as religion requires freedom. Freedom opens the windows of the soul so that man can discover his most profound beliefs and commune with God. Freedom and religion endure together, or perish alone.” -Mitt Romney



Really? Freedom and religion endure together, or perish alone? He either has LOST writers on his staff or he thinks all Americans are stupid as his hair looks.


My new favorite news story and priceless fodder for happy hour conversation:

German men are the world's worst lovers, a poll of 10,000 women travellers claims. They are branded selfish in bed while second-placed Swedes are too quick. Third are the "too rough" Dutch, followed by "too dominant" Americans, "sloppy" Welshmen and "too loud" Scots.
Englishmen were voted 10th worst and accused of being too chubby. Turks were marked down as sweaty, Greeks smelly and Russians hairy.

Italian men were voted best lovers followed by males from France, Ireland, South Africa, Australia, Spain, Denmark, New Zealand, Brazil and Canada. (london mirror)


What a fun little survey. I would say I have one disagreement (which most of you can probably guess; I kiss and tell) and three questions: 1) How loud do you have to be to be voted 6th worst lovers in the WORLD? Wow. 2) Where the Asians at? 3.) Canadians? Really?

Ciao, buddies.
-Nina

Fly

Happy Thanksgiving. Gobble Gobble.